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alexithymia

i will hold my breath, become content with waiting, bet every dime against the odds that you have stacked; forget the promises you hang around your neck and remind myself of all the things i long to hear. it’s always hope that fills me with the worst kind of fear. let’s pretend i concede defeat, does it mean you won’t love? i won’t be going down without a fight! i can tell that i’m a weight on your mind. i won’t be going down without a fight, so concern yourself with your last bit of pride. paper bags and broken bracelets, not to mention the time i’ve wasted playing cat and mouse inside a lion’s den, but at what cost? i am everything you asked for and you got what you deserved. a mouse’s life is worth its weight in gold but i am not worth my own
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